Love and Harmony

Naran

Suja (name changed) asked me at the end of the workshop “I Love Myself”, whether she can pay a visit to her paternal uncle’s place.

She was invited for a housing ceremony. She had some apprehensions because, her visits to her uncle’s always created tension and disharmony.

I told her it’s alright to go. If she faces any problems she can always leave the function midway.

She finished the workshop and did all the mental exercises I asked the participants to do.

At the end of the workshop, I told the participants to complete all the exercises that they didn’t do in the class, within a week from the day of the workshop.

Somehow, Suja felt that she should at least do one exercise on the same day of the workshop and the day before she attends the function on Sunday.

She picked the first one in the workbook, under the affirmation” I AM LOVED”. Instead of doing the exercises, she simply chanted the affirmation for more than an hour.

On Sunday, she visited her uncle’s house along with her husband.

During the function one of her relatives lost six thousand rupees. Somebody stole it from him. The servant who works for her uncle was suspected of taking the money, though it couldn’t be proved.

During this commotion, Suja silently chanted the Bach Flower Remedies, “ROCK WATER and CHESTNUTBUD” – a good combination when you lose something.

Within an hour, her uncle was able to get a confession from his servant, as well as the money that she stole.

Her uncle asked Suja what she was doing during the commotion as she was seemed to be in a trance the whole time. She replied that she was chanting the name of flower remedies.

He was happy to hear this along with his family, friends and relatives too. They openly complimented her for her selfless efforts.

On hearing it, she got elated and felt loved.

I came to know the whole story through her husband who thought I am the reason for the appreciation she received from her relatives, who were always ill-treating her.

Explanation

She picked the one affirmation from the workbook, which was the need for the hour. And what made her to pick that?

It was picked by that part of her mind that was activated because she did all the exercises sincerely. She is one of my students who religiously do whatever I tell them to do.

Interestingly even though she was listening to the “I Love Myself” CD for more than a month, only after doing the exercises she was able to tap the resource that helped her to receive the love that she expecting from her uncle.

Deepa told me few months back, “My husband is a rogue. I want to divorce him. How can I compromise on this issue?”

1. I gave herBach Flower Remedies Rescue Remedy and Holy.
2. I asked her to do the acceptance Mudra and do the affirmations.
3. I asked her to affirm, “This is how god has made him. This is how god wants him to behave. With him, there is something I need to learn.” The very statement may appear simple. But, it works very well with couples.
4. I also asked her to affirm, “This is how god has made me. Let me not interfere with Divine Will. I am happy to accept God’s Will and Divine Order from today”.

Acceptance will come when you understand there is a divine purpose behind everything and if we do not to interfere with the Divine Order.

When you accept, automatically a new pattern of thinking will come and you will feel a new surge of energy.

Change in you will change the other person. We only need to have patience and acceptance. Then alone we can adjust to our circumstances.

Life is nothing but adjustment and comprise. That’s the Bach Flower Remedy Walnut! Take Walnut or chant the Switch Word ‘Adjust’.

Feedback from Deepa

“Till today I feel alright. I have become a new person. I could accept my husband as he is”.

Naran S. Balakumar: Whenever she meets me, she used to say, “These affirmations are so divine that the moment I think about them, unusual peace dawns on me and all my anger vanishes.”

Referring the article “Remove negatives Reinforce positives” about handling a job interview using EFT (tapping) the client has the following discussion with Naran:

http://healbyeft.wordpress.com/2012/05/19/remove-negatives-reinforce-positives/

Client

Interview is one thing.

I have only one wife and I don’t have prior experience either. This is my first and last marriage.

How do I achieve harmony in my marriage, when I found nothing of that sort from day one of my marriage?

Naran

What qualities represent harmony for you?

Client

Peace and Happiness are the two qualities that signify harmony for me. If I find them in my marriage then I would say I have harmony in my marriage.

Naran

Where else in your life you have found peace?

Client

If I sit by the stream in my native village, which flows from a nearby mountain, I will find peace.

The whole area is nothing but trees or green bushes. Even if they are not crowded, they are pleasant and soothing.

Naran

Anyway, color Green represents harmony.

Take a picture of that stream or any stream that gives you that peace.

Keep the picture on the left hand, tap continuously until that feeling gets strongly registered in the mind.

What represents happiness for you?

Client

It is our joint family gathering during festival days. Of course, we don’t meet any more and I don’t have a picture either.

Naran

I am sure you can hook into those memories of happiness once again. Just keep thinking of those happy memories and tap.

Now, the feeling of happiness has come to you.

Now, affirm “I find harmony in my married life’ for as many times as possible.

Explanation

Govind was about to learn car driving and he was scared. He affirmed, ‘Even though I am afraid of learning car driving, I choose to learn it in the same way I learnt scooter riding’.

In fact, he successfully learnt car driving without anybody’s help.

In the case of a job interview, we would have some instances where we have done well. So it is easier for affirmations to work.

In the case of marriage, where we can’t bring a required emotional point of reference, then this technique of NLP can be employed.

Patient

I was blindly chanting the affirmations for the last few days:

“I release the part that ignores her”.

“I align with that part that loves her deeply and totally”

I was surprised that I had been ignoring not only my wife, but in the past, my mother, my sister and my ex-girl-friend too.

I think that’s why I had a break-up with my ex-girl-friend. I used to think she left me. Now, I realize I am the reason behind it.

Anyway, how do you know I was ignoring my wife?

Naran

The part that reacts to outside world (say, blaming others for your problems) is your outer-self.

The part that witnesses your outbursts is another self, which does the watching game and is the inner-self.

Even when you react negatively, the inner-self is not worried. It keeps quiet.

When you keep releasing, you will go deeper and deeper and eventually you will touch the silent-self, which is beyond positive and negative.

Now, you have touched the silent-self for a little while. Because of that you have found out the truth that it’s your wife who’s reacting to you. So when you change, she will change too.

Now answering to your question, “How do you know I was ignoring my wife?”

Ignoring our loved ones shows we have a fear of intimacy – afraid to get closer to loved ones. Therefore, we use conflicts to get away from our loved ones, exhibiting our fear of intimacy.

Keep doing the affirmations for some more time, so that you will understand better and better how you are culprit behind your problems.

In a way, this will stop your blaming (WILLOW) and make you take responsibility for your thoughts and actions.

This way, you will be empowered to take charge of your life.